The Empowered Lifestyle with Ellen Whitehurst

So, Sex and the City 2, well, um, let’s put it this way…I needed a night off and some serious mind candy and yum, yum.  Otherwise it pretty much sucked.  Seriously.  Felt so contrived that at times I was even writhing in my seat.  Or maybe that was because my dress was so short that the backs of my thighs were sticking to it.  Whatevs.  But the drinks and apps beforehand were fun.  Thanks Joe.  Wink.  Okay, again, I go out with women in my ‘hood who are eons younger and miles more thin than I am and sometimes, just sometimes, there’s a guy who hits on me.  EVEN ASTOUNDS ME.  Or should I say, ESPECIALLY astounds me.  So, thanks again Joe. Wink.

Now, to today’s inspirations.  I had all the windows in my house professionally polished today.  Not kidding.  I keep up with them all through the year but twice a year, in late spring and early autumn, I get the windows washed by people who have squeegees and soap that doesn’t squirt out of a Windex bottle.  And I do this, yes, yes, because I’m so OCD that I should be on meds.  But that’s not the only reason.  I do it for Feng Shui reasons as well.  See Feng Shui says that windows are superdy duperdy important!  Really, REALLY important.   See, if energy or Chi is the power behind Feng Shui than symbols and patterns are the language it speaks.  Look, your immediate environment conditions every daily experience that you have.  Period.  Symbols are the way your psyche subconsciously and actually interprets your environment.  And we have tons of symbols all around us all the time.  The stove represnts cooking which then becomes a universal symbol for and of abundance.  Liikewise the bed represents relationships and love while the bathroom, well, that stands for cleansing and eliminations.

Windows are the eyes of your home.

How you see out of them STRONGLY influences you energy, your psyche and your day to day thoughts, activities and inspirations.  In fact, your view out any window mimics or becomes a metaphor for how you see the whole world.  Feng Shui says that windows not only symbolize how you see the world in the present but also how you view it in future.  Okay, so, if a window is dirty or, worse, cracked/blocked/chaotic than those same influences can worm their way into your subconscious.  It won’t come as any surprise either that this philosophy says that windows are also related, literally, to your eyes themselves and any vision problems you might be having.

Stagnation, depression, frustration or bright possiblities, career growth, a sparkling future….you pick.  But I’d be gettin’ out the Windex if I were you.  The minute you do you’ll see some other things so clearly that it will be miraculous.  And we are thanking God it’s Friday after all, so, miracles should be the order of the day!

Speaking of Friday…stay safe and stay loved and stay the WONDERFUL YOU that I know you are!  HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!

Honestly, was that really the best that they could do to give Simon a send-off from Idol after he gave them nine years of his life?  Really? Yeesh.  Glad they’re not my ‘team.’  And, honestly, that was the best they could pull off as a season finale?  An aging Alice Cooper, an aged Hall and Oates (although, I have to say that John Oates must have had Dorian Gray paint the portrait that’s hanging in haute(s) closet because he hasn’t aged a bit!)  And, then, to top this whole 70’s reunion off out comes Michael McDonald???  How the hell to Xtina get in there and wasn’t she ready to go home once she got in the green room and saw who else was ‘starring’ on the season finale!  I swear, those were musicians I used to rock out to when I was my son’s age…and I’m friggin OLD!  I felt like I needed to go get my record player out and then ‘uncork’ some Boones Farm while sneaking a drag of a Doral menthol.  OMG.  But Lee won and that’s all that counts.  Because Simon wanted him to.  Not because he was better than Joplinsox.  Even though he’s leaving…Simon says…………

And just so you know it’s me….did you see Kate lumbering on the stage with her giant red feathers?  And then the whole ‘I Will Survive?!?!?!’ schtick.  What you should do Kate is go home and give those kids a bath.  Or a home cooked meal.  Just get off the dance floor.  You are RIDICULOUS.  I think we could pluck Lurch from the Addams Family and put him on the floor with Maamaa and they would look like Astaire and Rogers next to her.  I’m soooo betting that Tony’s agents wangled an additional $50K just to have him have to carry her around like one of those mannequins from the Old Navy commercials. 

Anyway, by all accounts it was a great night.  Grayson got his cast off and even though the fracture is healing, he does have a deep bone bruise that will just have to heal on it’s own (read: more whining for more weeks!)  But by the time they did the sixteen extra xrays (they kept needing more xrays for some reason?) it was too late to take him to see his dad AND make lacrosse practice so we visited ole pops and then I made him go to dinner with me instead of making the last twenty minutes of practice.  A rare outing these days.  He and I having dinner alone.  And we had lots and lots of fun.  And then I had all the season finales to look forward to once I put the finishing touches on the June Empowering Days content.

And those energies, the ones associated with what will happen in June, actually begin with today’s FULL Moon…I know, I know, it says NEW Moon on my website at www.ellenwhitehurst.com but that was my bad.  I asked Sarah to sprinkle her graphic genius fairy dust on that ancient secret symbol that I had and when I sent her the stuff, I wrote NEW Moon.  So sue me.  No.  Not really. 

So, here’s the skinny for fat protection and huge positive vibes for this FULL Moon (!!!) and moving forward into the Cosmic Cross of Chaos and the end of June Eclipse of Doom:

Download the symbol off my site and put it in your KNOWLEDGE and SELF CULTIVATION area.  That’s all you have to do.  Easy as can be.  But POWERFUL beyond belief.  We aim to please here at the Ellen Whitehurst Sacred Space.  Plus I have to go and get ready to meet the chicks from the ‘hood because we’re going en masse to see SATC2 tonight.  Making it an early movie though because I wouldn’t miss Jill Zarin showing up unexpectedly in St. John at Ramona’s retreat for the world!  Nope, not for the world.  Gonna try and fit in a quick visit to Pop in between.  So, you’re on your own.  But you’re on your own with some magic of the highest order on your side.  And speaking of being on her side, what was Kate doing during that dance last night?  Okay, okay, I’ll stop……….

But the energies of this FULL Moon have just begun.  And we got the goods!  YAY for us!

Not much time today so congrats to Derek and Kitty and to Joplinsox who, barring any sort of phone fiddling, will win the Idol crown to put over her rasta braids tonight.  Which I’m finding a little oft-putting even though I was her biggest fan early on.  She’s just been annoying me of late, while Lee came on gangbusters.  So, I’m staying true to form and hoping Lee pulls it out.  But if it all comes down to last night, like I said, congrats Mamasox.

Okay, not much time today since the last call to the hospital found Mister Mister in la la land, well, not exactly la la land.  He did tell me however that he was at his sister’s house and well, unless she bought the big ginormous hospital he’s in, um, not so much.  But it wouldn’t surprise me to find out that ole sis squealed some of the old matriarch’s money away and could afford to splurge on the medical real estate though.  Oh just another long southern gothic story for another story-tellin’ time!  Anyway, have to run because my kid gets his cast off today and can then start doing something besides sitting the bench at lacrosse practice and then coming home to me all frustrated.  YAY!  CAST COMING OFF!  YAY!  But, wait…what then will be the excuse in the morning why he can’t get his ass in the shower on time if he doesn’t have the “it takes a million years to put this plastic bag on”  …hmmmmmm.

So, let’s get right to it shall we?

More on the Full Moon kicking off the energies of that wacky Cosmic Cross tomorrow.  FOR RIGHT NOW, please kids send this to every friend, family member and loved one you have…even if they think you’re crazy.  Who cares?  It will bring them TRUE MAGICAL COSMIC PROTECTION AND EXCELLENT ENERGIES and will bring you terrific (read: TERRIFIC!) Karma.  I don’t really have time to go into the beautiful magic associated with this next exercise but it exorcises…bad / negative energies while calling in INVALUABLE assitance and blessings from some mighty positive ones.

Print out the image at the top of this post and then think carefully (meaning…use your intuition by quieting down for a few minutes and then following your hunch!) about what special pen you will use to create this next talisman.  Then, write this on the back of the Archangel of the Seven Rays:

Michael

Raphael

Gabriel

Souriel

Zaxiel

Badakiel

Suliel

ONCE YOU HAVE DONE THAT, THEN WRITE THIS:

Saturn, Zaphiel

Jupiter, Zadkiel

Mars, Camael

Sun, Raphael

Venus, Haniel

Mercury, Michael

Moon, Gabriel

Hang this somewhere where you can see it UNTIL BEGINNING OF SEPTEMBER.  Oh, just do it, I know what I’m talking about.  If you want to get really proactive you can also carry a copy with you as you go about your day.  I think I might paste one on my forehead.

This is GOOD stuff kids, really and truly good stuff.  Go ahead and work yourselves into a state of expectation because not only will be turn those rocky roller coaster energies coming soon on their ear but we just worked it so they work in in OUR favor.

Yup.

Because we can.

OH YES WE CAN!

So I’ve spent the better part of the last two weeks coordinating with doctors and physical therapists, with social workers and home health care private nurses, with renovation experts and private duty healthcare aids in all attempts to finally bring my son’s dad home from rehab today.  WEEKS of trying to get everyone on the same page and lined up like little ducks all quacking a happy duck song…and…then…

Pop fell in the rehab yesterday and now is back in the hospital cardiac care unit with some sort of a subdural hematoma (a bruise?) on the right frontal lobe of his brain.  At least he still has one.  If you know what I mean?

He’s being kept in for observation for a few days and then will have to return to the rehab as a new admission.  Arrrggghhhhhhh.  Just to have put that all into place was a personal masterpiece of scheduling and timing.  And remember, I’m trying to swing all the coordinatin’ while answering all the hater emails about moving Shuistrology to the Facebook fan page and finishing the samples for the new book proposal.  And I’m pretty sure I have a kid, but, well, you know how that goes.  Oh and I just now remembered while writing this that he has to have that crazy shark tooth of his pulled too.  Yikes.

Anyway, now I have to start all over again with all the logistics.  But at least I get the chance…unlike Evan and Anna, Derek and Hello Kitty.  So, I guess that’s why all the experts were giving Erin a good shot and great odds at taking home the mirror ball. They must’ve known that Max was going to pull out all the stops.  And he/they did.  Good job underdogs.  No, not you Bethany.  And I don’t watch 24 but EVERY SINGLE CLOSE FRIEND AND EVEN CLOSER FAMILY MEMBER I HAVE DOES, and, so I hope they were satisfied with that show’s end and aren’t too sad to say so long to Jack.  Tonight should be interesting. Season finale of ‘Dancing’ and end days of ‘Idol’ but at least I don’t have to worry about getting LOST anymore.

On the upside Sarah has almost put GENIUS finishing touches on that (shhhhhhh!) secret symbol we’re going to be offering off the site to enhance the energies of Thursday’s New Moon and I’m beyond thrilled at the final result.  It’s true magic of the highest woo woo kind so dust off your carpets kids, it’s gonna be a smooth ride.

And also just heard from Doctor Oz’s people that they want a head shot from me.   That would be if I still even had a head! I might guess that that might mean that I might be starting as a new contributor on his site sometime soon?  We’ll see because me and doctor’s go together these days like pinot and grigio ….lots and lots and lots of pinot and grigio.

Now, since it ain’t five o’clock yet, I’ll have to make myself imbibe some calm and peace some other way lest I get my whining and my wining all mixed up.  Maybe I’ll do this easy astral body cleanse called “periscope”……

Imagine that you’re pulling a periscope out of the top of your head (through the crown chakra) and you pull it out until it extends about a foot above your head.

FROM THIS HEIGHT, look through the pericope and start to quietly witness and observe your external world.  Think about any differences you might see or what kind of perspective you gain from looking at things from this height.

NOW, every/any time you encounter a challenging situation, immediately put your periscope up and observe what’s happening almost as a bystander.  This helps you look at the ‘bigger picture’ while lending a sense of neutrality and detachment with a big hit of widsom attached.  Even now, just writing this, I’m feeling calmer already.  And while I’m here, let me just say that nurses really are the unspoken heroes of the world.  Couldn’t pay me to do that job.  Fergie maybe, but not me.  I guess I can pull my personal periscope in now that I’m not feeling so under water anymore.  Try this ancientg Russian destressing technique whenever you need.  I gotta go find my yellow submarine.  Maybe I  left some psychodelics on board. Oh no, here’s the hospital calling again…..dive…dive….dive…..

So now Brittany Murphy’s husband is dead of natural causes too?  Does this even sound plausible to you?  That she died of natural causes and now he has too?  Two people not even in their forties?  Doesn’t sound kosher or plausible to me at all.  But last night’s finale of LOST did.  In fact I am one of the old timers that have been with this show from the beginning.  And who was also sastisfied with the ending  Hey, c’mon, the Dharma Initiative used a BAGUA as their logo, OF COURSE I was going to be hooked.  But I was almost more interested last night in the banter between the two EPs during the pre-show.  It was revelatory and almost mystical as they waxed philosophical.  Of course I don’t know why no one mentioned J.J. Abrams early influence on this show, but, que sera.  Either way, I think it was Carlton Cuse last night who said that they didn’t so much invent or create the show as they did just sort of ‘step into it’ or something like that.  IT’S WHAT I’M SAYING ALL THE TIME!!  It’s the whole Thomas Edison thing.  He told tale that in order to invent anything he would have to get himself into a sort of half sleeping meditative state.  He would actually hold steel balls in his hands so that if he fell completely off to sleep they would drop and wake him.  The list of great men and women all down through the ages who have ‘stepped’ into their greatness is voluminous.  It’s all there.  Anything and everything we could ever need.  Every answer, plan or project that can and will propel us into our own sense of security, comfort, fulfillment and happiness.  Where once you were lost, now you can be found.  As long as you stay still long enough to tap into and touch Universal consciousness.  I like to say that your thoughts can create the cosmic blueprint in the ethers but your action steps can concretize it into a reality.

Think about your Treasure Map.  Keep shining a light on it until Thursday’s Full Moon.  Keep saying your affirmation: “‘Divine Love, through me, now dissolves all seeming obstacles and makes clear, easy and successful my way.”  And, then, expect your miracle because there are more things in Heaven and Earth Saeed, wait, I mean Jack…no, wait, I mean Sawyer, Hugo, Locke, Jin, Sun and Kate…oh…now I know who I mean, Horatio of course, there are more things in Heaven and Earth Horatio…and you know the rest right? 

Go ahead and get dreaming. 

And Jimmy Kimmel is a genius.

Hysterical.

Hilarious.

Genius.

Gonna give ‘Dancing’ a real run for the money now.  And why is everyone betting on Erin?  I guess we’re about to find out. 

Okay, so, we left off on Friday talking about something called the TEN EMPERORS’ COINS OF THE QING DYNASTY, an UBER powerful wealth cure that literally adjusts your Chi so that it/YOU now ATTRACT abundance.  Lots of it too!  That’s because this cure symbolizes or represents the actual abundance of the ten Qing Dynasty Emperors who reigned from 1644 to 1911!  This cure also promises to improve your bottom line as well so let’s get to it shall we?

On Friday I posted an image of the coins used in the cure.  I asked you to print that image out and put it in your WEALTH area.  Okay, today, I want you to do something a shade different.  You can either….cut out each separate coin from  Friday’s image and affix them in a VERTICAL manner to a yellow background (yellow construction paper perhaps?), with each coin image just ever so slightly overlapping the one on top of it…OR….you can just take today’s image and affix that to a yellow background and then place THAT in your Wealth area.  For the not so faint of heart who want to be totally purist about this cure, you would actually get the actual adjustment from any on line Feng Shui resource which is a cure that consists of the ten coins connected by a red cord, hung vertically with a yellow cloth behind it.  The coins are placed so that the side with the most Chinese characters faces outward.  BE APPRISED that the golden color/cloth that sits behind the coins is a critical component of this cure as this is said to give the cure it’s power and support.

Now, here’s why we don’t need to get all up in arms about reaching out and finding this cure.  Because today I’m going to offer you a POWER FULL meditation to do using this coin cure as a visual only.  I just need you to imagine or see with your mind’s eye the TEN COINS HANGING VERTICALLY ON THE YELLOW CLOTH BEHIND IT.  Just like in today’s image.  That’s all.

Sit in a comfortable position and breathe normally.  Now visualize that same Ten Emperor Coin Cure circulating inside your feet, like an eel swimming round and around under the skin of your tootsies, the coins moving like an invisible excess burst of secret Shui energy beginning to bring you WEALTH AND ABUNDANCE wherever you stand.

Next, see this Coin Cure circulating all around and inside of your hands so that you receive much more WEALTH and MONEY in the coming days, weeks and months.

Now, see the coins circulating around the inside of your head, so your thoughts will now continually create more opportunities thereby then creating much  more abundance for you as well.

Lastly, see the coins coming down from your head and then circulating through your limbs, first up and down and all around your neck, shoulders, arms, upper back and breast area.  Then down circulating all around the abdomen and lower back on their way to moving up and down and all aorund the inside of your legs.  Eventually they end up back flowing all around and back down to your feet again.  To put you on solid financial footing.

Steps up opportunities that will spring forth right where you are planted.  Enhancing your individual CHI so that you become an abundance/money/wealth magnet.

A WEALTH MAGNET.  Hey, I’m attracted to you already.  Pretty good for a Sunday!  Pretty effective everyday!

A

First and foremost …  THANKS (!!!!) you guys for your swell and overwhelming show of support to and for my own wily wish list.  It’s really not in my nature to actually ask for help but I feel like we’re all in this together and that if one of us needs something than it’s up to the rest of us to lend energy and effort.  You did that in SPADES yesterday and today trying to make sure that GMA has me on their radar while also beefing those Facebook fan numbers.  You’re the biggest and best friends a girl could ever have and I’m so grateful!  Drinks on me!  No, I really mean it, I just spilled my crappy coconut water down the front of my shirt trying to sip and type at the same time (not the first time that’s happened either…sipping and typing…if you know what I mean…wink.)  Really you guys…I’m trying to like this stuff, but, yuck.  Maybe Madge’s water won’t have big flakes of coconut floating around in it but the Goya I gotta does.  If this truly is the anti-aging miracle that Madge and Gwynnie swear it is then I’ll keep throwing it down since it’s cheaper (on every level) than Restylane, Botox and Zumba classes.  And let’s face it, I’d need to mix the coconut water with a giant bottle of vodka before I’d ever inject anything into my face, so, maybe we’re better off with me staying on the search for the fountain of youth in the Latin section of A&P? 

But who has time for grocery shopping and face-lifting when there’s serious carping to be done during this end of school time of year?  We’re in the middle of SOLs here and since the hormones kicked in (around mid-January) and my email became a staple on the address book of every teacher my kid has, well, time to take some woo woo action.  Look, each August/September I dedicate tons of posts to all the (pro)active steps we can take to make sure our kids walk down the aisle wtih a mortarboard on their head and a diploma in their hand as each school year closes so I won’t go into all that fodder right now.  But I will lend you some stuff we’ve been doing around here and, well, I have to say as much as a big mouth wise ass as my kid is (my kid?  A big mouth and a wise ass?  WTF????) he still pulls down pretty good grades.  In fact, he’s almost straight As in his gifted program, and I KNOW he ain’t gettin’ all that educatin’ from the HOURS he spends on Facebook every night, so, somebody somewhere is looking out.  Or, should I say something?  That’s right, even though it sounds fishy this next cure kills two intentions with one carp.  As you might imagine, I pride myself on my carping.

Download an image of (and type it into your search engine EXACTLY like this) ‘Double Dragon Carp Jumping the Gate.’  Now, place that high above the entrance doorway to your home.  This placement ensures that each time any of you step outside the home you will imbue the characteristics and qualities of the dragon, full of strength and smarts as well as determination, smarts, courage, smarts and more smarty smarty having an I’m so smart party.  As if by magic you (and the loved ones) will take on those same attributes.

Here’s the thing about his image…according to Feng Shui anyway.  It’s believed to give a big (and speedy) boost to those looking to climb the corporate ladder too because it also promises upward mobility and, what else, luck!  But, really, the bigger promise of this placement comes from it’s legend thereby making this dragon carp the last word (hear that big mouth bass?) in BOTH monetary and scholastic success.  Meaning that it can BOTH bring money and keep the kiddies out of detention and on the fast track to early admission to Columbia when placed with those same intentions.

Very quickly I’m going to add something else I’ve been making my son do lately.  He’s been carrying a small statue of a magpie.  Not enough time to go into ALL the scholastic success this promises as well, but, like I said, so far, he’s doing pretty darn well where the grades are concerned.  Even this morning he almost forgot his fine feathered talonsman (let’s NOT discuss what it took me to get him to carry it on him to begin with but if you play lacrosse and know what a new head costs…well….)  But, then, today he has his English SOL and he came tearing back in here after he left for the bus because “I forgot the lucky bird.”  Three days before he was contemplating flipping me one.  Just sayin’….(an image of one will work too but they have to carry it with them.)  

So we’re protecting your money and pushing the grades higher.  Niiiice.

And, speaking of money, see the image I included at the top of this post.  Print it out and put it in your WEALTH area (back left-hand corner of the main floor or of your bedroom or both.)  This is called The Ten Emperor’s Coins cure, a powerful wealth activator that adjusts your Qi for ABUNDANCE.  It represents the abundance of the treasuries of the ten Qing Dynasty Emperors and Lloyd Blankfein.  Just kidding about that last part.  This cure harbors, heralds and holds a powerful force for improving your financial status and your position.  For today, just place this somewhere in your WEALTH area.  Over the weekend (yes, yes, I’ll make a rare blog appearance over the weekend since y’all have been so phenomenally generous to me) I’ll post a POWERFUL (!!!!) meditation to go along with the Emperor’s New Coins.  You’ll see.  This is good stuff. Now get going.  You got some carping to do!  I know, sometimes it’s good to know me.

And, as usual, stay safe, stay loved and stay the wonderful you that YOU are!  Don’t know what I’d do without you!  Truly!

Well, honestly, I knew it wouldn’t be long until Chopra knocked off the top spot over on those DailyOM.com courses what with the way they’ve been uber promoting his new effort alongside the fact that he’s been marketing up a storm his own self.  In fact I saw him on ‘The Colbert Report’ the other night and was hysterically laughing relating back to Patty how Deepak was trying to show Steven his ‘shadow’ and how quickly and hilariously Colbert retorted to Chopra.  Deepak told Colbert that he was arrogant and a “know it all” and Colbert responded by feigning incredulousness and saying that he was just ‘confident.’  This banter went on for a few minutes with Chopra continually pointing out other nagging parts of Colbert’s ‘shadow’ and Colbert steadfastly maintaining that he is just ‘confident.’ Anyway, I’ll tell you what I’m planning on doing about regaining that top spot on that niche site as soon as I share another little plan I’m hatching.

See, when I first got on this path, Deepak was one of the authors that I studied and read, voraciously.  In the beginning he was such an inspiration to me.  He still is now although there are other traditions, cultures and modalties that engage my attention at the moment more than his Eastern shadowy slant does.  But, again, he was an intial inspiration as I climbed aboard my own Orient express.

INSPIRATION being the key word here. (Watch my segueway here because it’s genius!) Good Morning America has been doing a series all week called ‘WHO INSPIRES YOU?’ kicked off by the different anchors and co-hosts recounting their stories of who has been an inspiration to them throughout their lives.  GMA also inviting viewers to log on to their site at ABCNEWS.COM to share who inspires them.  Can you smell where I’m going here?  As far as I can tell there’s no contest going on (therefore no winner) but they did ask for input from the outside and since I am so unabashadly intent on getting some sort of national telly recognition…..well…..

Here’s the thought….IF you feel that any of my blog posts or newsletter fodder, advice from my book, my iVillage daily tips, my specialized reports, monthly Shuistrology or even my personal answers to some of your personal emails etc etc et……IF you feel that ANY of that at ANY time has offered insight comfort, empowerment and/or INSPIRATION to you I am asking (read: pandering/begging) you to log onto this link:

http://abcnews.go.com?GMA/mailform?id+10624213

And then take a just a bitty minute to fill out their comment box.  Like I said, I don’t think there’s any sort of carrot on a stick here, but, I do think that if enough of you thought enough of me than it would put me/my brand/my passion on their radar.  And that would be enough  And please don’t think that you don’t have to log on because someone else will…I need YOU to help me and am asking for that same thing today.  Just hit the link, express if you think my content is inspirational and helpful and then sit back and let Karma do the rest.  Because kids you KNOW that what goes around comes around.

Now, what to do while trying to climb back into the DailyOM top spot while also garnering the  attention of someone over at GMA while waiting for the Wendy Williams Show to call?  Oh…right…

Remove the Nine if Cups card from a Tarot deck and place the card upright between a gold and silver candle.  Light the candles and while gazing at the card, clearly and deliberately (intentionally) articulate/state EXACTLY what it is that you want (you know, like global domination or something like that) and, then, when the candles burn down (do use tea candles so we can all watch KelBen have her breakdown on Housewives tonight together) then you place that card under your pillow and leave it there for nine nights.

I’d say “Sweet Dreams” but it would be so rhetorical.   YOUR CUP WILL RUNNETH OVER!  With inspiration maybe?  Uh huh…..

Tomorrow we’ll talk jobless claims, unemployment rates and protecting your position and your income.  Saty tuned kids, and we’ll all be just fine as the rest of these changes shake out all over the place.  It’s GOOD to be us!  Remember that.

So yesterday I was sharing about how in my house when we were growing up my mother (and grandmothers, aunts, cousins and assorted stray people from the same Celtic bloodline) ALL were so conversant in what saint did what and who you could call on for every conceivable obstacle, illness or challenge that is was actually funny.  There wasn’t a day that went by when I wasn’t told to invoke some saint or another… earlier on to help with sometimes petty potential problems (“Ma, I can’t find my homework”) and, then, later, to save my sullied soul (“Ma, I swear I WAS home by 11!”)  Saint Barbara would make the rains go away (ostensibly so my mother wouldn’t have to try and maneuver the giant caddy out of our tricky driveway to drive us to school while it was pouring rain outside) and Saint Augustine when we broke a bone (ditto Dad having to bring us in for xrays!)  Saint Basil was invoked whenever a legal or courtcase was involved (another post for another time but I’ll just say this now, my brothers were TEN TIMES worse in that arena than I ever was!) and Saint Cecilia before they all gathered around the organ in my living room (!!!!  enough said  !!!) to sing songs that should have required them to also wear straw hats and striped barbershop shirts.  But because me granmum on my ma’s side was Margaret, well, ‘Peg ‘O My Heart’ was a staple that actually acted as the starter pistol for their Friday night bridge games.  (I just reread this for typos and realize that it seems like I grew up Dancing With Wolves in the little house on the Prairie) when really I grew up in New Jersey (cut to me fistpumping while spraying my hair with fake tanner.)

But, by far, one of the most oft used advisos ever given was the one that involved ‘The Blessed Souls of Purgatory.’  No, no, not Jack or Sawyer, Kate, Jin, Hugo, Saeed or Locke (although JJ Abrams we saw that coming from seven years away!) but, rather, those poor souls who were apparently stuck between the worlds on their way to heaven effectively sidestepping the fires of Hell.  The way we kids learned it, everyone had to do their time in purgatory after exiting this planet before queing up at the Pearly Gates.  Eastern religions call this state the ‘Bardo,’ a transitional state that can also be interpreted as the ‘island.’  (HEADS, I even know who/what the smoke monster is!  And it’s not my cleaning lady who’s out ont eh edge of my driveway puffing away as I type either!)

This purgatory or Bardo state was a space where we are supposed to spend reflective time being sorry for our sins and then purging them so we can go on to liberation, Nirvana, HEAVEN.  Now, as kids, we were also told that one of the only ways for these poor blessed souls to get released from purgatory was if someone still alive prayed for them.  Prayed really, really, really hard.  Especially if they went down on Oceanic, oh, okay, I’ll stop.  But, truly, my mother made us pray for those poor souls at least a couple of times a day.  And then she would tell us this:  if you are somewhere where you MUST wake up at a certain hour but don’t have an alarm clock (remember youngins this was before AT&T alarm apps will wake you with a gentle nudge on the thigh) then you were supposed to rely on the always awake souls in that in between state.  The actual ritual went something like this:  if you need to ensure being awake at a certain hour but can’t rely on outside resources to make sure that you’re up and at ‘em then you should say seven ‘Our Fathers’ and seven ‘Hail Marys’ before asking the blessed souls to wake you at the appointed hour.  Apparently their city never sleeps.  Anyway, upon awakening at the exact time, you were once again requested to recite another seven ‘Our Fathers’ followed by another seven ‘Hail Marys’ not only in gratitude but also to liberate seven suffering souls from their Bardo before blasting them on to ecstasy.  Unfortunately I could never get past the idea of a bunch of troubled (and headless…don’t know why I thought that, but, I did) souls slipping into my bedroom at the wee hours to wake me…that thought alone could keep me awake all night long anyway.  See?  No need for the supernatural wake-up call when I was wide awake all shaking in my pink fuzzy slippers anyway.

Now, that said, I did however get in the habit of praying for all those souls and even to this day when I cleanse and clear the space in my house before I bang a gong on my singing bowl always ask that the sacred sound it makes release all souls from the lower dimensions and allow their souls to transcend and reach enlightenment as well as sweet relieving liberation.  The smoke from incense can accomplish the same liberating thing as long as you pray for that intention before you light it.  I always try to remember to help liberate those souls while doing sound or smoke work.   I just don’t want them liberatin’ in my bedroom at 5 o’clock in the morning.

Speaking of bodies in my bedroom in the early morning hours, buh bye Ocho.  You were one of the only reasons I even tuned in.  And is it just me or was Joplinsox a little pissy and defensive last night?  Doesn’t matter Lee locked it all up anyway.  Allelujah!  I was more LOST on Lost then they are/were??  Probably could have been way more up to speed if I wasn’t turning on Glee every twenty seconds.  I soooo have to get a life!  You know, after Casey comes home tonight, um, I mean, after Casey GOES home tonight.

As for tomorrow, I’m going to be asking a special favor involving, what else, TV!  Or should I say ME and TV.  Until then I need to jump and get ready for my MORE magazine interview this afternoon….oh, and, one last….Deepak Chopra has a new course out on DailyOM.com and they’ve been promoting the shite out of it.  But we’re still holding steady at number ONE with our love report even if he’s breathing down my nervous neck.  His report only just debuted yesterday so I’ll have to wake up good and early tomorrow morning to see if he dethroned us….now, if I could only count on someone to get me up at a certain hour…….. 

There are so many of you who are new to our empowered group and so I want to just quickly explain what I mean by the Super Stellar Day of the month.  See, every month I assess and evaluate the energies of certain and specific days (predicated by planetary possibilities and potentials of course!) and then I pick one single day that packs the most enthusiastic punch and…. then…. I addendum that information with something special from the woo woo world I travel in so we can all take full advantage of BIG blessings that the Universe has to offer on that same day.  Genius ain’t I?  Yeah, yeah, I know.  Anyway, I have it set up so that only subscribers to my newsletter can access the link to the Super Stellar info because I always want to have something that gives back to that one group for showing their support and sharing their love.  If you want to access this same information in the future then you could pop by www.ellenwhitehurst.com and sign up and get your energy aligned with our collective so that the whole idea of ‘masterminding’ (when two or more gather together with the same intent and goal) begins working it’s magic to and for YOU as well!

And do stay tuned for a plan that’s hatching regards our coming together literally to do just that same sort of thing.  Tammy and I still ironing out the kinks Lola.

But, for today, let’s chat a minute about why I would have picked these energies as the bestest of May.  Firstly we have lovely and loving Venus feeling all inspired and then trining Neptune too.  This interaction usually ends up spilling some of that excellent inspiration all over the rest of us.  Venus is also apparently hitting the adderal again as she is busy, busy, busy squaring Saturn today as well.  This is that energy that says ‘ALL WORK AND NO PLAY’ is your freakin mantra all day!  The promise inherent here is that (especially since the Sun is trining Saturn….jeesh, I was wondering where the sun was these days!) ANY INTENTIONAL PLANS MADE NOW ABSOLUTELY PROMISE TO PAY OFF LATER!  Nose to the grindstone and all that.  Except you Heidi.  No more chiseling your face AT ALL no matter what crazy (and I do mean CRAZY!) Spencer says.

Let’s break this down in a quick and easy update.  Find some inspiration today.  Go within and take a listen to that still, small voice.  No time for that tomfoolery?  Then do this (I learned this from a Medicine Woman /Shamaness / Goddess while training years ago and it NEVER fails):  Turn and take the first book you see and place it on your lap.  I don’t care if it’s your car’s warranty manual.  Just grab one.  Now, with this book on your lap, breathe slowly four times while keeping your LEFT hand on top of the cover of the book.  Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.  Empty your mind and get ready for inspiration.  After the fourth breath, RANDOMLY open the book to any page and write down the VERY FIRST THING YOU READ.  This will either answer a question you have or will give you some sort of direction.  And don’t send me three thousand emails telling me what your book said.  FEEL / INTUIT what YOUR personal message it.  It’s right there waiting for you to take it and run with it!

You can also do this exercise.  Take the passage the Universe picked and in red pen write a story around it that makes use of one of your hopes, wishes and/or dreams.  Add a dollop of your imagination to the (left) hand picked inspiration and CREATE YOUR REALITY.  Put this piece under your pillow at night and read it first thing in morning and then again at night before bed for nine days straight.  INCREDIBLY AND INDELIBLY POWERFUL!  I don’t need to add happily ever after right?  You knew that already right?  Good.

As is the intercession of Padre Pio.  I’m not going to go into ALL of the extraordinary miracles he is responsible for both while walking this planet AND while he’s been gracing the heavens above. I first heard about Pio from one of my other most revered teachers, Hilda Charlton.  But to be honest I’m surprised that my mother didn’t school me about him.  Appealing to saints was sooo up her alley.  We grew up calling on ALOT of them….(Anthony when something was lost and Jude when things were really tough, Anne when someone wanted to get pregnant of have a healthy baby and then, ultimately and often Peregine for lost cause cancer cases…just to name a few.)  But I’d never heard about Pio until I was much older.  Then, yesterday, while waiting for the doc who thought I was channeling me dear departed ma (see yesterday’s post for my humbling experience) I pulled a book from my bag (Kindle Schmindle!) and I did what I’m telling you to do here in this post.  I sat with left hand firmly feeling for insight and then after a few deep breaths (no stethoscope though thank you very much!) I opened to any page.  And it was all about Pio.  On and on and on about ALL of the myriad miracles he has performed for those who have called on him and invoked his intercession.  Story after jaw-dropping almost unbelievable story.  He told so many who he ‘appeared’ to that their own guardian angels had carried thier requests to him and that he was there to answer their pleas and prayers. 

It’s a wonderfully supportive day today.  If you or someone you know could use a miracle call on Padre Pio and expect his answer to bring you comfort.  Because it will.  It really will.  My miracle will be the ability to watch Idol, Dancing, Glee and Lost all at the same time tonight.  I don’t think I’ll bother Pio with that though as I’m pretty confident he has other more important matters to attend to…although more important than the almost finale of Lost?  Hmmmmmmm….

Before we all prayed as a group together, there was no relief in sight for that massive oil spill spewing petrol all over our precious ocean.  But, first thing this morning, before I left for the DOCTOR DAY, I heard that BP now has some sort of tubing in place that is actually helping to stem the slick.  After we all sent collective energy and beautiful healing intentions.  Keep praying kids, keep praying that we can help to heal this Earth we live on.  Because we ARE doing it! We’re actually doing it.  Yay for us!

Now, let’s talk about more ‘Before’ with a shade of ‘After’ thrown in for good measure.  But, first, the weekend.  Nah, never mind.  I’m still processing some misspent energy that crossed over to anger almost as soon as the weekend began.  KNOWING that the only person that actually affects is me while also knowing that the only thing I can actually choose here is how I react, I am working (hard) on forgiving and blessing and then figuring out how to get some of this toxicity out of my life forever and ever.  NOW, back to DOCTOR DAY.  See, I have to drive the dad to all of his doc appts now and so I pretty much try to schedule them all on the same day so I don’t miss too much work.  Did that today.  So, got the glam on and headed out to see Cardiac Surgeon before meeting all others.  Now, I’m sitting in his office with the ex waiting and in comes this doc who I’d actually only met once while old dad was in the hospital.  I seriously can’t remember what I had on (and you’ll know why I was wondering in a second) but do know that ALOT of those visits followed a work out or grocery shopping etc etc.  So, when this guy walks in his office earlier, he extends and shakes the Pops hand and then goes to shake mine and looks at me as if he doesn’t know me.  I shake his hand and say “Ellen” at the same time to wit he says………..wait for it……….

“I THINK I MET YOUR MOTHER IN THE HOSPITAL!”

Well, um, unless you were with Jimmy Von Praagh or Sylvia Browne and communin’ with the dearly departed, I think you must be talking about ME!!!  Of course, what I said was “yes, she told me.”

MY MOTHER!  AGGGHHHHHHH.

But I swear that’s how much difference hair and make up make on me.  I’m so not kidding.  How long it takes me to do my hair is legend among family and friends.  Never mind slapping on the spackle.

But this did remind me of a story from a looooong time ago.  When I was in my early 20’s and living in Manhattan on the lower East Side, I had a little drycleaner that was literally almost right out my apartment door.  He was so close that on some mornings I would go and get my clean clothes before I showered and got ready for the day.

And, then, on some days, before I rubbed my face with my magic Mister Clean eraser, I would take my drycleaning back in, effectively seeing that little Chinese owner twice in the same day.  Before and Apres shower and spackle.

On those days this did happen he would ALWAYS (and I mean ALWAYS!) say to me:

“Oh you sister was here again this morning.  You sooooo much pretty more than her.”

And I would shake my head like I felt so sorry for my ugly sister and then I would flash a glam smile at him and tell him that we both loved him equally to which he would sort of blush and stammer and then tell me to get out so he could get his work done.

Twenty years ago I was my ugly / pretty sister Before and After.  Now I’m a Mother / Daughter combo.  Friggin time marches on doesn’t it?  And apparently as I get older I ain’t getting any better either!  Unless I have me my MAC on.  So, the lesson here is, that if ANY of you hear that ANYTHING has every happened to me that renders me incapable of either, make SURE that you send someone to do the hair and makeup.  Lest they get me mixed up wtih my ugly sister / older mother and amputate the wrong leg, or whatever.  You get what I mean.

And you better believe I went RIGHT to the local Kroger and picked up a dozen cans of Madonna’s latest anti-aging fad, Coconut Water.  Right there in the Goya aisle.  She is investing in a new company producing this apparent miracle aqua.  We’ll see since I’m starting first thing tomorrow.

Everything turned out A-OK today too, no stitches thrown, no problem pain and no bruising.  Except my ego that is!  Pretty sure that pretty soon Ocho will know what I’m talking about.  We’ll see.

I’m sitting here today and I’m trying to get my May 15 iVillage deadlines all written but first I needed to spend some time on the horn with Jill out in Chicago this morning to talk about how that love report is still holding steady in the number one seed over at DailyOM!  Great stuff.  And then we had to jawbone the vodka deal.  More on that when there is more to tell.  Except I could have used a GIANT glass of same while trying to swallow Real Housewives last night.  I actually even flipped back and forth to ‘Private Practice’ too until they had the most unrealistic season ending of all.  Anyway, still trying to wrap my brain around what (if anything) to do about my son’s current lax dilemma when all of a sudden a flurry of emails fall into my inbox, one after the other after the other.  And they ALL (I swear I am not making this up….every single of them…in some way or another…..) had something to say about this BP oil spill.  And they ALL in some way or another said that oil is Earth Mother’s blood and that she is hurt and bleeding out now.  It made me so sad.  I finally got it that this isn’t just ‘another oil spill’ to have to clean up.  This is a pipe stuck into Earth’s surface that is causing her to bleed.  And each of these emails that I just received also asked me to ask all of you to pray for her, our mother, Nature.  Gaia, the earth who nurtures and nourishes each one of us.  These mails asked me to ask you to spend some time this weekend in prayer for her that she might heal……because then so will we.

So, I’m going to reprint a letter I received that about says it all.  And, then, after that, I’m going to offer a prayer that we can all say, at anytime, to help heal our mother.  Because we are her children and it’s the right thing to do.

Here now, from the Native American nations:

A letter from Chief Arvol Looking HorseA Great Urgency
 
To All World Religious and Spiritual Leaders
 
My Relatives,
 
Time has come to speak to the hearts of our Nations and their Leaders.  I ask you this from the bottom of my heart, to come together from the Spirit of your Nations in prayer.
 
We, from the heart of Turtle Island, have a great message for the World; we are guided to speak from all the White Animals showing their sacred color, which have been signs for us to pray for the sacred life of all things.  As I am sending this message to you, many Animal Nations are being threatened, those that swim, those that crawl, those that fly, and the plant Nations, eventually all will be affect from the oil disaster in the Gulf.
 
The dangers we are faced with at this time are not of spirit. The catastrophe that has happened with the oil spill which looks like the bleeding of Grandmother Earth, is made by human mistakes, mistakes that we cannot afford to continue to make.
 
I asked, as Spiritual Leaders, that we join together, united in prayer with the whole of our Global Communities. My concern is these serious issues will continue to worsen, as a domino effect that our Ancestors have warned us of in their Prophecies.
 
I know in my heart there are millions of people that feel our united prayers for the sake of our Grandmother Earth are long overdue.  I believe we as Spiritual people must gather ourselves and focus our thoughts and prayers to allow the healing of the many wounds that have been inflicted on the Earth. As we honor the Cycle of Life, let us call for Prayer circles globally to assist in healing Grandmother Earth (our Unc’I Maka).
 
 We ask for prayers that the oil spill, this bleeding, will stop. That the winds stay calm to assist in the work. Pray for the people to be guided in repairing this mistake, and that we may also seek to live in harmony, as we make the choice to change the destructive path we are on.
 
As we pray, we will fully understand that we are all connected.  And that what we create can have lasting effects on all life.
 
So let us unite spiritually, All Nations, All Faiths, One Prayer.  Along with this immediate effort, I also ask to please remember June 21st, World Peace and Prayer Day/Honoring Sacred Sites day. Whether it is a natural site, a temple, a church, a synagogue or just your own sacred space, let us make a prayer for all life, for good decision making by our Nations, for our children’s future and well-being, and the generations to come.
 
Onipikte (that we shall live),
 
Chief Arvol Looking Horse
19th generation Keeper of the Sacred White Buffalo Calf Pipe
(Wolakota.org)

Center for Sacred StudiesP.O. Box 745Sonora, California 95370209-532-9048

And, now, a prayer to Archangel Ariel, ruler of the winds and the elements and prince of the waters.  His is a being of Divine influence over the forces of nature.  Referred to as the ‘Lion of God’ he tracks the physical nature of Earth as she evolves to her dimensional destiny.  Let’s say this as a community this weekend.  Now that doesn’t mean that we need to invoke Ke$ha and watch the tic toc so we can say these prayers at the same time.  We can also just prelude this invocation by asking that our prayers be added to all others being sent from this community.  They will hold the same weight and bear the same results.  Here now:

Prayer for the Elements

“Almighty powers of Nature and Beings of the Elements

I align with Fire, Air, Earth and Water

in harmony and service

to all life everywhere.”

For ALL life everywhere.  Yours mine and OURS.  Amen.

Stay well, stay safe and stay loved and by all means stay the wonderful you I KNOW you to be!  Amen to that too kids, Amen to that!  Have a great weekend!

I was kind of surprised that Big Mike got the hook on Idol last night since I definitely thought that he was TEN TIMES better than Casey..for the last few weeks actually.  But it’s between Lee and Krystal now, so, we’ll see whether Dylan or Joplin comes out on top.  Feel like I’m back in the Purple Plum.  Okay, okay, enough reminiscing especially since we all know I’m not even old enough to know who Bob Dylan or Janis Joplin are.  B.O.B. maybe, but Dylan?  Nah.

I have to make this short too since I have an extermninator coming here in a few minutes.  Which will, I promise (and stay with me) lead me to the synchronocity surrounding today’s post.  See, I had pretty much no idea what I was going to write about today.  I’ve covered the whole New Moon thing to ad nauseum and also have given enough info about these same energies in all my blog posts and Empowering Days info and even in the body of the May newsletter itself.  EVEN I’m tired of hearing me ‘talk’ (and that pretty much NEVER happens) but, then, today something weird happened.

Well, actually, starting about a week ago something started to trap my attention.  First, okay, well, here goes…first this was this horrible smell out in my garage.  Like something had died out there.  Grayson and I were both taking turns going out there to see if we could find a mouse or God forbid something bigger (I have fox and possoms walking through my yard CONSTANTLY.)  But, neither of us have found anything (because I’m fairly sure that neither of us has looked too too hard either.)  I called Kath and she said that if it were some sort of rodent than the smell would eventually go away.  See, my problem is that I don’t have the time to take from my day to attend to all of this.  Not when I’m running to my son’s dad condo to meet all the Powers That Be there so suggestions can be made to make it Jetsonville so he can go back and live there once he EVER gets released.  And, as we know, it’s double lacrosse all season.  Until today when I just heard from one of his coaches that they might want him to sit out travel tournment season because of his broken arm.  Never mind how that will break his heart.  But I also think this coach has a jones on for him because there’s some past history so I want to hear what my son thinks first before launching into full Mama Bear mode.  Okay, back to OUR story:

So….then…..my friend Anna asks me to connect with a friend of hers and give her a reading of sorts and when I do I find out that this new friend raises rats.  Second time that the whole rodent issue comes front in center in a world that takes quite a lot to get my attention these days.  Mice.  Rats.  Rodents.  Oh My.  What does it all mean?

Stay with me, there IS a point…..

So, today an email from my personal astrologer June drops in and it’s talking about this New Moon and this Cosmic Cross and this and that but she keeps leaning on the financial aspects and how we all have to safeguard our money (sound familiar anyone?)  I then decide that today I’m going to write about one of the Wealth gods in Feng Shui called Jambhalas and that I’ll post a picture of one of them with this diatribe.  I go to google images and I type in some such thing like ‘Jambhalas who bring wealth’ and I get the picture/image of the Yellow Jambhala at the top of this piece.  Then I go to one of my treasure trove of resources and I look up yellow Jambhala and here’s what it says:

“Images of the prosperity god Jambhala were used to invoke windfalls.  He is shown sitting and is often accompanied by A RAT!”

Don’t ask me but third time’s the (magic) charm as far as I’m concerned.  So here’s the mantra that goes along with the Yellow Jambhala and his little ratzo Rizzo:

“Om Jambala Jalandraye Svaha.”

It is believed that if you say this 108 times while making a strong wish for the Jambhala to bless you and your family with prosperity, that this wish will soon come true.

Just sayin’  …..Quite a tail eh?

HAPPY NEW MOON!  Here’s come the May we’ve been waiting for. Rats and all.

Okay, so, by now we all know that I’ve been wrong, wrong, wrong (!!!) about what day Mercury came out of retrograde (yesterday, NOT Monday!) and what day the fab New Moon falls on (tomorrow NOT today!)  I think we also all now know that Ellen is a big ole blonde having a few of those same bleachy moments over the last few days.  BUT, that said (and, of course, ) Ellen also has a great little story to tell…………come close kids, this is a good one……………….

So we know how last month when I made my Treasure Map I ended up at the 11th hour putting a piece of the MORE magazine logo on my board even though I hadn’t heard back from the freelancer editor who had initially contacted me about being the focus of a few page piece inside that same national women’s title real estate?  Okay, so what I didn’t tell you is that I actually had a bigger intention (read: plan!) and that was to eventually pitch a column to those pages based on the same Shui and astrology ideal I embraced and wrote about over at Redbook.

But I hadn’t heard from the editor and just figured the deal died and went on my merry way.  Until it came time to you know what or get off the pot (the chamber kind, not spliff) and so I bit the bullet (chock full of aphorisms today kids) and went ahead and represented MORE on my map anyway.  And, then, as we all know, I awoke the VERY NEXT DAY to an email from the writer saying that she had heard back from MORE and they were still interested in the story and would let her know a pub date once they figured that out.

So, because I thought TODAY was the beginnings of May’s New Moon lovefest, I actually got my map out yesterday and put it over by my water fountain/dining room window and positioned it so that the MORE logo had the sun shining directly on it.

And, yup, you guessed it (stop getting so far ahead of me you guys, you know I can’t keep up these days!) late yesterday a mail popped into my in-box that essentially said that the project/story had been given the official green light and that I was picked as one of five women who would be the focus on an October cover story called ‘Reinvention IS The Best Revenge,’ an article about women over a certain age (I think it’s 22…yeah 22…let’s go with that) who had to reinvent themselves and have had success doing same!  They picked me!  I’m sooo excited.

And, now, our plan…..we’re going to wait for that article to come out and then we’re all going to send tons and tons of texts and emails saying how we want me to write for that magazine.  Okay?  You in?  Let’s face it, we are talking Ellen and we are talking October…by then I’ll still be trying to find time to write my book proposal while working on the gajillionth brilliant brainstorm and marvelous marketing plan while pitching somebody else about something else that has magic and empowerment written all over it.  But it’s a good plan right now don’t ya think?

Anyway, just in case you missed it, SHINE A LIGHT on your Vision Board starting tomorrow.  For today though let’s go ahead and get ourselves a brand spanking new affirmation that will embrace all the nurturing and nourishing vibes that are about to hit us square in the puss:

“Divine Love, through me, now dissolves all seeming obstacles and makes clear, easy and successful my way.”

Amen kids, AMEN!

And you know the drill…nine times out loud when you wake up BEFORE your feet hit the ground, I don’t care how badly you have to pee.  And then nine more times out loud sometime during the midday and, then, finally nine times out loud before you go to sleep at night.  All the rest of the day, write it, say it silently and by ALL means ANYTIME you find yourself engaging in stinkin’ thinkin’ (you know, like how you can’t believe you got an email from your ex’s other ex asking how he’s doing because his daughter hasn’t been here to help one single bit and so she can’t really offer updates…yeah…that kind of REALLY UNPRODUCTIVE and useless waste of energy and time) STOP and replace those thoughts with your POWERFUL and EFFECTIVE affirmation!  We’re going to stick with this until the Full Moon rises so go ahead and get comfy with it.  And get CLEAR, EASY and SUCCESSFUL energies flowing right to your door!  Opportunity might knock but this affirmation will walk right in and take a seat so no worries about anything at all.   

Oh and speaking of front doors…..Casey, when  you get the boot from Idol tonight I’ll be waiting for you at mine!  Nice work Big Mike!  Nice work.  C’mon home Casey honey, mama’s waiting!

Okay now, just so we don’t get TOTALLY off track talking about empowering actions and such, let’s recap some Elly telly thoughts, ideas and illuminating insights!  Firstly, the two brothers who won Sunday’s night AMAZING RACE cheated.  I’m not saying that they wouldn’t have won anyway, but, they cheated and recitified their actions in the name of ‘it’s a game and we’re going to win no matter what.’  Since Grayson and I have effectively been watching alot of that same show together (when he wasn’t complaining about his elbow hurting and I wasn’t yelling at him to ‘suck it up’ that is) I had my work cut out for me a few nights ago.  He was taking the side of the cheating brothers and I was sticking up and trying to educate about how EVERYTHING the cowboys did was taking a higher road EVEN if they lost the million bucks.  My son couldn’t seem to get past the losing money to be a better person part.

So then I reframed.  I asked him what he thought the cowboys should have done instead of just allowing the two brothers to cut in the line at the airport and then again when the one cowboy brother could have potentially moved the winner brother out of his place during their time at George Lucas’ studios.  My son thought that the cowboys should have ‘made’ the brothers back up after cutting in line at the airline counter and also though that ‘since it’s just a game’ should have shoved the winning brother out of the way during the virtual video game.  Instead, the cowboys allowed the brothers to get the first tickets and also to finish their game with no violence or shoving attached.  The cowboys took the higher road.  Period. And, personally, I don’t think anything would have changed the outcome of the game but it certainly gave us some food for mother/son fodder.  And I found out that the million bucks would override manners and respect for another human being if that were a prize offered in the is house too.  Boy oh BOY do I have my work cut out for me.

And uh oh Ocho.  You be in BEEEEG trouble now.  Only ousting Niecy can save your very nice ass now.  But, really, does it matter since you were never going to win anyway.  But you were VERY fun to watch.  And, well, I lied.  I did attempt to watch the Real Jersey Harpies last night but I fell asleep during another one of Daniell’es contrived efforts to stay in the spotlight.  And speaking of Danielle doesn’t New Jersey have a Child Protective Services too?

And speaking of Child Protective Services…Grayson has a fracture in his elbow by the growth plate that he might have gotten from getting whacked over and over and over again on the same spot on his arm because (wait for it…) as he told the Ortho Surgeon and his PA and the nurse (quite an audience don’t you think?);

“OF COURSE I wear pads but they’re really old and pretty much crap.”\

So, then, when the big important doctor asks him (while peering over his big expensive glasses and looking directly at me):  “Well, if your arm was hurting so much why didn’t you just get new and better ones?” (something I bet we’d ALL love to know the answer to), he replid:

“Because I didn’t want my mom to have to spend the money.”

You know, the expensive pads that cost about SEVENTY FIVE PERCENT LESS than fifty gajillion xrays and soft casts and …..well, you get it.  But, then again, he though it was okay to push the winner cheater brothers back in line at the airport, so, like I said, boy oh BOY do I have my work cut our for me.

And part of that is going to include taking my Treasure Map and putting it somewhere where I can shine a light on it from tomorrow’s New Moon all the way through the Full Moon that rises end month.  This New Moon in Taurus is ALL about taking what you started last month and now nurthuring and nourishing those efforts.  The energies associated with THIS New Moon (as opposed to the bloodsucking sex’y one) are ALL about manifesting and being determined and persistent in those same sorts of efforts.  Because the promise is that ALL of those same efforts are going to pay off for you.  AND TAHEY WILL DO THAT MUCH MORE QUICKLY AND EASILY WHEN YOU ARE IN THE ENERGETIC AND COSMIC FLOW!  Tomorrow I will give an affirmation that will embrace all of these promises I’m making now.  And that will help to make your dreams come true.

For today though I am also including a link to my friend and internationally acclaimed astrologer Kathy Rose’s video talking about all same.  She gives some great advice about seeding your dreams too.  We got you covered.  Like a soft cast!  OY!  Have I got my work cut out for me!  Okay, go find that lamp to shine on your VISION and shine, baby, shine!

http://www.youtube.com/user/roseastrology?feature=mhw5
 

First, my friends, the GOOD news … (no, let’s make that the GREAT news!)  Mercury, a planet that has been particularly troubling during this last retrograde go round, is FINALLY moving forward and ONWARD (!) today.  That’s right, no need to excessively worry about what you say or how you say it or even who you say it too.  Cell phones and computers are safe from cosmic connundrums now that Mercury’s moving ahead again now too!  But, better than that is the fact that this foward momentum happens immediately prior to a pretty fabulolus New Moon that rises on Wednesday.  I actually have a video from my friend and astrologer Kathy Rose shedding light about that astro event and will post it here tomorrow, but, for today, let’s talk about what all this celestial celebratory influence should mean to each of us.

Of course, I’ll get to all of that as soon as I share what a relaxing and memorable Mother’s Day I had.  Well, one out of two isn’t bad anyway.  Started the day okay enough.  Woke at a friend’s beach house with the sun shining and the temps as chilly as any post menopausal women could hope for!  The boys all still sleeping and the smell of fresh-brewed coffee competing against that sort of musky musty smell that any beach house worth it’s salt tempts and teases with.  Took my shower and go my glam on before being cornered by my son in the room I was staying in, ONCE AGAIN, complaining about a pain in his forearm.  See, a few weeks ago we played a really dirty little team and one of their defensemen whacked Grayson on his arm with the little ahole’s big stick.  Grayson pretty much complaining about it ever since although mostly after practices and/or games which are pretty much every day now.

On Saturday I finally straightened out my MOTHER OF THE YEAR crown, repositioned it firmly over the cute coif and told him that I’d take him for xrays before we headed to the Outer Banks.  That was before I got a call from my friend saying that I had game time wrong and needed to get there ASAP.  Who?  Me? Have my times wrong?  That friggin Mercury retrograde (okay, okay, it’s really me…I’m terrible at times and directions…TERRIBLE!)

Never made it to the xrays.  Until we got back into town yesterday.  And I ONLY took him so I didn’t have to hear him whine anymore.  Wanted to PROVE to him that growing pains hurt on kids who are growing twenty inches a week.  That was, you know, until the doc came out and showed us the fracture in his right arm.  Yeah, the same right arm that was starting to see a tear in a tendon from overcompensation because he was still playing and practicing with this fracture for the last three weeks.  OMG, quick, somebody sell the tiara.  Mommy doesn’t deserve it.  Nah, never mind…I figure it evens out when I have to spend my entire Mother’s Day morning driving two hours back into town to spend another one waiting for the films to show fracture.

And, c’mon, let’s face it… the smug consolation that my son got for my mothering faux pas more than made up for any guilt I gots me!  But, since they couldn’t cast him there yesterday and because we were right by his dad’s rehab facility, we decided to stop by and visit him then too.  Whereupon I was immediately accosted with the fact that he couldn’t find any of his clothes sans the ones he was wearing on his back.  See for the last thirty years since he’s been there…or six weeks, whatevs…I’ve been taking his laundry home with me, washing/drying/folding and returning before he even knows it’s gone.  BUT, for some reason (OH, who am I kidding…because I took TWO FRIGGING DAYS to catch up on work as well as to write and post May Shuistrology on Facebook ….don’t get me started there either…while also trying to get us ready to go away for ONE day over the weekend…..) the staff at the facility decided to take it upon themselves to wash his clothes.  Which would have been FINE with me if anyone had thought to put his name inside them.  But, they didn’t.  And, consequently, NO ONE knew where ANY of his clothes were.  So, I then had to go into their disgusting and stinky smelly laundry room and dig through patients dirty clothes to find my son’s dad’s stuff.  You know, so I could take it home and launder it and run it back up there today.

HAPPY MERCURY RETRO MOTHER’S DAY!

Anyway, it’s all over now, THANK GOD, and I’m trying to get the boy an appointment to get his cast set and I have to see if they can short cast him so we can play with our brand spanking new shiny travel tournament team…the one that got him all reinvigorated and reenergized about this sport after a disastrous last summer season almost immobilized him.  We were both pretty excited about playing with the new team that has coaches who are the cream of the crop in this neck of the woods as well as being past playing All Stars themselves.  And, now…..so, yesterday I say to the Urgent Care doc…”do you think the orthos can short cast him so he can still play in his summer tournaments?”…to wit the doc whirled around on his heels and glaring at me all of sudden started to have green shining lizard slits as eyes and then big nostrils grew where his nose used to be and volanic lava came spewing out alongside the boiling steam that was now pouring out of his mouth and ears before he spit at me while saying…”Mom, WHAT are you not getting about this?”  I felt like I had just put my Toddler in a Tiara while making her memorize the fan dance lead from ‘Gypsy.’

I guess I’ll have to find out from the ortho this afternoon whether he’ll still be able to play in any fo the tournaments or not.  Before, you know, they report me to Child Protective Services.  Hey, the price of gold is up at record highs, I should get a pretty penny for my mommy crown.

Okay, so, Mercury moving forward TODAY.  PUT THOSE PLANS AND PROJECTS that have been on hold back on the front burner again!  Make a call.  Send a text.  Hit ‘Reply’ on that email sitting in your In-Box and get your energies INTENTIONALLY moving forward again.  And then put a small round clear quartz cyrstal on the UPPER right hand side of your desk if you are a girl or the UPPER left hand side if you are a boy.  Because once that New Moon gets here on Wednesday, this month really begins.  And it’s gonna be great kids…just you wait and see…it’s gonna be great!

Happy HAPPY H A P P Y Mother’s Day to all of you out there who silently slave to get the laundry washed and folded while balancing the burgers in your back pocket that will get put on the grill after the bike tires get blasted back to full functioning again.  I just found out that we’ll be spending most of Mother’s Day on a lacrosse field practicing with the new tournament travel team  …..just making a guess here but thinking that NONE of those coaches were….thinking, that is….when they made this lax practice schedule. I am, however, CONFIDENT that their wives will point out the outrage once their own lunches and/or dinners are found to be dad-free! Actually I don’t much care since we didn’t have anything planned anyway….which is EXACTLY how I like my Mother’s Days to be served up….EMPTY of any and all responsibility except making sure my kid doesn’t forget to praise me and pamper me and all around kiss the ground I walk on.  Or just get to Rite Aid and get me a card…same thing.  See, every other year he’s had his dad to fall back on.  Dad has always stopped by on Mother’s Day to drop something special (NOT near as special as before I left him though…oh well.)  But, this year, like I keep reminding him, lil G’s all on his lil own.  And dad’s off the proverbial hook.  Unless it’s the one his IV is being hung from…but that’s another whole story all on it’s own and, frankly, who has the time?

So, what I want to do today is briefly remind that TODAY is that canoodling kind of day where Venus and Mars are meeting and making whoppee all over the astro place.  Those influences spill out and could cause you to be feeling frisky too.  Read  yesterday’s post if you want to find someone to fell frisky with.  And today is one of my son’s favorite friends 16th birthday too!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUIS!  Woo Hoo….driver’s license….oh, hmmmm…wait a minute……..

Okay, Real Housewives once again real embarrasing for Jill. And then Andy Cohen had Ellen Barkin(???) and Jersey housewife Caroline on his show directly after last night.  Carolyn NOTICEABLY thinner…due to, or so she says, ‘portion control.’  She’s so full of shit too because being a big boob girl me own self I was always kind of glad to see her huge bazoongas on national telly.  They weren’t there with her last night though.  So, unless her ‘portion contro’l includes apportioning parts of her boobs to the stratosphere, she’s had a reduction and she’s full of shit.  Just like when Star Jones kept telling everyone how she was using ‘portion control’ and Pilates …you know…alongside her bariatric surgery and suctioning of the fat from beneath her big belly.   The worst part about Star though was that she put her co-hosts in such an uncomfortable place where they would have to lie for her.  OMG…am I off on a tangent or what?  It’s just that I don’t understand why people can’t honestly say “I had a lap band strapped on and then got a breast reduction.”  Portion control.  Yeeesh.

Okay, off my soapbox and back to the matters at hand….stock markets and Mother’s Day.  Let’s kill those two birds with this one astrological stone…I have said it everywhere I possibly could lately, but, I’ll say it again….that Cosmic Cross that’s now forming in the sky IS GOING TO affect all of our finances in some way or another.  I literally blogged here the other day that PROTECTION will be the order of the day because of this T-Square, both of the personal/physical kind AND of the financial one.  The last time we saw this EXACT planetary alignment was both in the 30’s around the time of the great depression and then, again, during the 60’s during the cultural revolution.  I said it on Bob and Sheri the other day and even mentioned it on Facebook today…these energies speak to more terrorist plots and more global financial freakish agendas.  And even though I knew that international monetary markets would be affected and impacted, I NEVER suspected THAT agenda would start so soon as right now.  Just be careful of your money.  Period.

And one way for WOMEN ONLY to do that is to place three live, fresh rosemary plants in the kitchen, preferably on a window sill.  Nurture and love the plants as if they were growing the green for you.  Better yet, give them to Mom on Mother’s Day.  You’ll be gifting her with financial independance and freedom while also allowing a cosmic protection to permeate her existing bottom line.   This is an old and secret Feng Shui cure…THREE ROSEMARY PLANTS ON THE WINDOWSILL IN THE KITCHEN for financial relief.  And, these days, you just can’t have too much of that good thing.  Fits Mother’s Day to a (cosmic) T!

Happy Mother’s day… watch your money… and don’t lie to me about you nipping and tucking…speaking of nippping…is it 5 o’clock yet?  Enjoy the weekend.  Stay safe, stay loved and stay the wonderful you that I know you are!  See you sticks up or see you Monday, whichever comes first, but I’ll be sending light and blessings until then! 

Oh if I could only tell you what’s been going down around here.  Invitations to appear at a VIP charity event tomorrow night in Princeton issued by a super stellar someone who found me over at the DailyOM.  The bright light who reached out is co-chairing the event with talk show host extraordinairre Lynn Doyle and with celeb Jill Whelan as well (cue Love Boat theme if you don’t remember Capt. Stuebing’s little girl…and, yes, you can thank me for now having that play in your head all the rest of the day!)

Now this VIP event is a precursor to their big gala held in late October so I’m not feeling too too badly that I can’t make it there personally now since I will part the seas to get there pre-Halloween.  But, we have loads ‘o lacrosse this weekend.  I’m sooo not kidding.  And we’re traveling to it too.  Yes, yes, I know how jealous you all are that now the travel lacrosse season starts.  But, well, it’s only me that gets to drive and drive and drive to somewhere that  is so hot that even Osama Bin Laden would take a pass unless there was a cool cave close by.  But at least this weekend we’re with friends who own a house in the town we’re traveling to, so, it won’t be as bad as tossing the coin when the hotel we booked with TWO beds, assigns us to the room with one.  Ah….it’s ALL coming back to me now. 

Anyway, hostess and philanthropist Bernadette Gur is allowing me to send a basket ‘o Shui complete with a complimentary consultation with moi as THE door prize for the event tomorrow night.  Represent.  But I’m pretty sure this all represents my getting my business out there to a new level or echelon of eyes and I’m really really grateful.  THANK GOD for Tammy who totally saved the day by making the most lovely basket imaginable.  She and I also discussed the burgeoning beauty opportunity as well as our personal favorite…the vodka one.  But, see, this is ALWAYS what I do.  I distract from doing precisely what I need to prioritize, which, in this case, is my new book proposal.  See, alot of this activity comes on the heels of my also hearing from my lit agent that there are some ‘heavy hitter’ editors out there waiting on those same yet to be written pages.  I don’t know if it’s because I’m such a perfectionist (forget the Phd…it should say OCD after my name) OR if it’s some form of self-sabotage, but, here I am pitching more projects than Pat Venditte when I should be sitting my fat ass firmly in my desk chair and writing about magical recipes and delicious dreams coming true.

After I water the plants, of course.

Speaking of plants and dreams coming true…if LOVE falls under that umbrella for you, then I’m going to share a Russian remedy for finding it everlasting.  I actually added this to that LOVE REPORT that is still sitting in the Number One spot over on the course page of the DailyOM.com (hey, at least something associated wtih me is sitting still and doing what it should!)  And although I’m not keen on sharing the same content as people are paying for inside that ebook, I’m so convinced that one of the secret symbols we used in that report is BEYOND worth the price, that I’m okay with sharing this next Russkie ritual:

You’ll need a medium sized mirror and nine fresh pink roses with all thorns removed.  And you will need to do this totally and completely alone…so that you won’t be that way any longer.  You’ll also need to either be naked or be wearing something that gives you quick and easy access to your bare skin.  Again….something that someone else will soon be shooting for as well….

Now, put the flowers in a big vase and place the mirror next to them at a level where you can see your face in it.

Sit or even kneel in front of the vase.  Either way you need to be comfortable.

Take a flower fromt he base and stroke your hair, forehead, ears and cheeks and chin with the petals while you are holding the stem.  And get your mind out of the gutter.  We have important work to do here.

Allow yourself to completely be enveloped by the energy of love radiating from that flower.  Literally FEEL love all around your..surrounding you.

Now, close your eyes and while caressing your eyelids with the pink petals, say out loud, “I CAN NOW SEE LOVE.”

Bring the flower down in front of your nose and breathe in the aroma.  Breathe this beautiful scent right into your soul and say “I INHALE LOVE.”

Open your eyes and hold the flower high above your head and announce “LOVE is in my hands!”

Now, press the petals to your heart so that they are forced to open against your bare skin and feel the exchange of love that flows freely from the flower into you.  Once you can clearly feel this love then clearly state, “I FEEL LOVE.”

Lightly touch your solar plexus with the rose and say “I absorb love.”

Holding the flower in front of you, look at your reflection in the mirror and, focusing ONLY on your eyes, say the following words out loud:

“In front of me is LOVE.  Behind me there is LOVE too.  LOVE is to the right of me and there is LOVE to the left.  LOVE is above me and LOVE is below me.  LOVE is all around and inside me too.  I radiate LOVE an LOVE is coming my way.  I glow with TRUE and EVERLASTING love.” 

(I just have to stop and share right now that the classical music station that I listen to in my office just finished airing a Russian GYPSY orchestral arrangment and if that doesn’t say that thiere is magic afoot then I don’t know what would????)

Anyway, once you have finished this floral mediation then put the vase with the ALL of the flowers in a place where you will have to pass (and, therefore, see them) frequently.  However, you shold take the one you used for the ritual and carry it with you until it dries and then bury it in the ground while expressing your intense appreciation for the gift of LOVE it will soon bring to your, your heart and your home as well!

Okay, I’m off to fold laundry, um, wait, I mean, to write my book proposal..yeah, that’s what I meant…off to write my book proposal.  Wish me well….shiny and new, come aboard, we’re expecting you…the love boat soon will making another run…..uh oh…

Happy Cinco de Mayo, a totally Chi-potle style day!  In fact if any sort of spicy salsa that doesn’t involve a cha-cha-cha (let’s NOT discuss Pam going home last night because of hers!) should be on your menu today be sure to blend those chopped tomatoes with a sprig of cilantro or two as well.  Eating this herb is believed to keep you safe from all and any negative energies while providing protection of not only the psychic but also the physical kind too.  And, while we’re talking dirty dancing and spicing things up, don’t forget to take a pair of dried chili peppers and crossing them one over the other tie them all up with nine or 18 inches of pink string.  Place these peppers under your pillow and bring the heat to the bedroom right where it belongs!

Enjoy the collective energies of this celebratory day but remember that the heat really starts (as does all the good stuff May has to offer) once Mercury comes out of retrograde on the 11th.  In the mean, you have my full permission to let the tequila do that talking today, there’s nothing astrological stopping you.  Me?  I was put waaaaaay under the proverbial gun ysterday to get moving on my book proposal , so, I’ll be sequestered under a serape coming up with some kmore magically delicious samples for all of us to eventually imbibe.  Until then however, the cilantro and the Skinny Girl will have to do!  OLE!

The other day, someone I really respect, admire and think is truly very funny, emailed me about some of the dates that she’s been going out on lately.  The email was hilarious.  But the end of it wasn’t.  She concluded sharing her current escapades by also sharing that until she got ‘smaller’ well, no one could actually really be interested in her.  Romantically that is.  For real.  For real.  This mail came on the heels of another conversation with someone I love as if she were my own sister who said to me that she was hoping she wouldn’t wake up one day and regret how she’s spending her time during this part of her life now.

Now, my one friend absolutely knows how and what I feel about moving on with your life if you are unhappy, no matter how painful or scary.  But, the other friend is sort of new, so, I just sort of let the comment about wanting to be ‘smaller’ go.  Until now.  Because I noticed yesterday that I was doing the exact same thing.  Someone I was speaking to professionally asked me why I didn’t have any video up on YouTube yet…and I immediately went to the weight place.  And then I started thinking about that other email again.  See,  I was sort of taken aback when I read about my beautiful’s friend’s thoughts about her physical self, because although I know that she’s spoken of wanting to lose some weight in the past, I didn’t realize how deeply ingrained her sense of ‘someday’ is.  I mean, we all do it….when I have a better job, a better kid, a better frame of mind…THAT’S the day my life will really begin.  But, well, this isn’t a dress rehearsal.  This is IT.  This is your life.  HERE AND NOW.  Not when you’re ‘smaller’ (which by the way is a word that I am soooo uncomfortable with when describing a goal….when I’m thinner, or skinnier, okay, but NOT smaller.)  So, today, before I give some weight loss exercises from the woo woo world of Ellen, I just want you to stop and think about if you practice this ‘someday when’ behavior.  And then I want you to STOP it.  Immediately.  Act ‘as if’ and embrace and attitude of TOTAL gratitude for who/what you already are as well as for what you have in the gift of the present.  Even if that’s nothing near what you think you want in the future.  THANK THE UNIVERSE FOR WHAT YOU DO HAVE and take steps in FULL FAITH towards what you want.  Because that ‘someday’ is TODAY!  Give thanks and gratitude for THIS DAY. For who and what and how you are NOW!  And, then, you won’t believe how quickly and easily that ‘someday’ shows up.

I’ll start.  By swallowing my weight issue and putting a plan together for my first YouTube vid.  Now, truth be told, I was going to try and film a piece once before. I wanted to put a piece of red lace over my face with my fab blonde hair all coiffed around it.  And then I was going to have another larger piece of lace enveloping my body and, then, with Poker Face playing in the background I wanted to share Feng Shui Gambling tips.  I thought people would go GAGA over that.  But my little Spielberg resolutely refused to film me doing that sort of schtick.  I’ll think of something else that won’t totally humiliate him OR I’ll just enlist Tammy to film me on the Flipcam.  We’ll see.  But the point is that I won’t weight, um, I mean wait, another second to do something that I should have done eons ago.

Now you…..what have you been waiting for?  Take steps to stare the lion in the eyes.  He WILL turn tail and walk away, leaving you feeling brave, courageous and filled with what’s possible.

Like Evan.  He got his lowest scores on ‘Dancing’ last week.  But, that didn’t stop him from turning out the dance of the SEASON last night!  I would have watched that over and over again instead of spending one more second watching the Real Housewives of New Jersey.  Look, I’m from New Jersey.  In fact, I’m from a town very close to Franklin Lakes where that show is shot.  I NEVER EVER EVER knew ANYONE like these women.  NEVER.  Enough said.  I won’t watch again.  Until, you know, next Monday.   Please MTV, PLEASE move The Hills and The City back to Monday nights so I won’t be tempted to change the channel to cheesy.

Okay, now, not much more time before I have to run (literally) so let’s do this.  You agree to look up Dr. Masaru Emoto and the experiments that he has done with water and then you get a case of artesian (ONLY!) same.  Take the symbol off the top of this post (you’re welcome by the way) and replicate it a dozen times.  Affix a symbol on each bottle of water and then bless and thank the water for helping your body to be it’s best while also helping it to lose toxins, fat and waste.  EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU DRINK WATER, all the day long, continue to thank the water for helping you to lose weight.  And spend some time drinking in this symbol as wel.

This isn’t all wet.  In fact, it’s a wonderful way to own your power and kick off a new weight loss program that will go swimmingly!  I’ll be doing this right along side you and then maybe won’t feel like I need to wear a giant elasticized piece of red lace to make a YouTube vid.  Maybe I’ll just need a smaller one.  We’ll see.  I still think it would be funny.  In fact, I wonder what Tammy’s doing today?  Hmmm…………….